My coworker got engaged over the Easter holiday weekend. Ever since getting engaged, she’s been running around the office planning for her wedding in February. As I worked my way towards her desk to congratulate her on the recent engagement, I could hear her on the phone fighting with a wedding vendor. It was a week into her engagement and she has already turned into an official Bridezilla. I said my congratulations and quickly escaped from the line of fire. As I ran for cover, I thought about all the things I wanted to say to this young, anxious bride. I wanted to tell her to RELAX! You are making a commitment to the love of your life, that’s all that really matters. I wanted to tell her to BEWARE! The euphoria of wedding planning can distort your perception of reality, and when it’s all said and done, you are left with nothing but a foggy memory of the day. I also wanted to say BRACE YOURSELF for the times, both good and bad, that may lie ahead.
I then started remembering my own wedding day. I wanted a small, intimate wedding with family and friends, nothing big or extravagant, just a special day to share with ML and my loved ones. However, ML wanted none of that. Actually, he wasn’t concerned with making any of my wedding “dreams” come true. He insisted on getting married in city hall. We compromised by getting married on vacation. At the time, I felt so fortunate that ML would even consider marrying me (with all my personal baggage) that I didn’t demand all those things young girls dream about for their wedding day – a beautiful dress, fancy ring, and a wonderful party. I didn’t want him to change his mind by making our wedding day plans an “inconvenience” for him. Even on our wedding day, I feared him leaving me stranded at the altar with a wilted bouquet of flowers and a broken heart. Much to my relief, he showed up to the ceremony and we were legally married in a far off destination, away from our family and friends, on the beach. Despite all this, it was still one of the most beautiful and happiest days of my life. Then again, none of this matters anymore.
Enigma,
Wow. I really relate to this. I commend you for being able to give your congratulations. At this stage for me, I would have to fight off instincts to tie her to a chair and scare her into reality, lol!
What I knew about marriage before getting married is a single grain of sand on an entire beach.
But it sounds like you had a beautiful wedding day. I hope that someday, you will be able to look back on it and smile for that alone.
Have a great weekend!
Bernadine.
Thank you, Bernadine. I hope to be able to do just that – smile. Right now, it’s all too painful. My one year anniversary is rapidly approaching and I’m afraid of how I’ll react that day. Oh! Fun times
Well, I hope you got at least one good year out of your marriage. I still have to play the “happy newlywed” role for others that don’t know what is going on:( I’m pretty sure I’ll be working that day. ML will want to go out to dinner afterwards, but I’m not sure. We’ll see how I feel that day. Valentine’s Day this year was a disaster!